on obnoxiousness

While I certainly appreciate the spirit with which the epic P.Z. Myers embraces obnoxiousness, that is not really my purpose here. I don’t wish to poop in anyone’s faith-pool of choice, in fact I even envy the apparent peace people derive from their quiet theistic convictions, the comfort they must get from the thoughts that their god or gods of choice are with them, on their side, carrying them through the sand when they can’t walk alone and all that jazz. And it must be lovely to believe that, in death, they will ascend to some really cool place like Valhalla or Nirvana (not so much Heaven, that place would bore the snot out of me). I tried, and tried and tried, for YEARS and years, to find that kind of blind faith; I failed. But I respect your beliefs, whatever they are, as long as they don’t include intolerance of other faiths, or the ostracism of individuals with different sexual orientations, or the oppression of women, or if they involve any type of forceful coercion of others to believe what you do. And it is not my intention to go about gleefully skewering various egregious acts of hypocrisy, making jokes about priestly buggery or snide observations about pregnancy rates amongst abstinence-only educated teens or any of the various other things I could point at and sneer or recoil in horror or whatever the appropriate expression of disdain might be. That’s just disrespectful to individuals who share a similar faith-label with those miscreants, and I certainly mean no disrespect.

But if you’re one of those people who thinks the biblical history of creation should be taught in schools, even though the old testament is one of the most reprehensible pieces of shit ever smeared on parchment by a bunch of genocidal assholes, I am not inclined to suffer you gladly. Or if you just survived a terrible accident and you thank your god instead of the heroic first responders or random passers-by who actually pulled your sorry ass out of whatever you were trapped in. Or if, after thanking the wrong entity entirely, you go on to say it must be because your god has a special purpose for you, implying that the other unfortunate folks who didn’t make it out met their horrific demise because they were useless. Or if you explain away the untimely death of a loved one by saying it was your god’s will (what kind of murderous asshole is your god anyway?) or the even more ridiculous claim that your god loved them so much that he/she/they/it called them home early – what, exactly, is the message there? Be a complete fucktard, or else your deity will slaughter you at some tender age just so you can come hang out? Please. Or if you’re Ben Fucking Stein, or if at any point during “Expelled” you found yourself thinking, you know, Ben Fucking Stein has a good point there. Or if you flash your titties for photographers at age sixteen and diddle yourself on video for your fucked-up boyfriend then try to tell other people what’s moral. Or if you are Joseph Fucking Farah. Or if you think that out of all the religions in the whole history of ever, your particular brand of idiocy is the One True Way and everyone else is eternally damned.

OK, I guess I’m pretty obnoxious. That P.Z. Myers is a smart guy.

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